18 years. Countless, often overlapping roles. Sleepless nights. Fatigue & despair.
I ache and ache and ache. Young bones carrying a soul that feels broken.
It makes no sense. Your 30s are when you’re supposed to have it together. All I feel is an incessant dread and anxiety that continues to consume me.
I am consumed by thoughts of productivity, worth, and my value amongst it all. The time to simply be: loving, joyful, human…doesn’t exist.
This is what led me to decide to move abroad. There has to be more than grinding to get by. I am going to find it.
Packing up my bags, moving myself, & then my pups, out of this country. Giving this new opportunity my all, so that no matter where I end up, I can say I did it instead of dreaming it. No more playing it safe, because this current way of life is hard enough.
And I’m willing to risk it all for softness.
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